I know we are obsessed about the weather in this country but really after dominating every news bulletin for the whole week I really don’t think it’s news anymore.

I am sick to the back teeth of turning on the TV to find out what’s happening in the world only to find news anchors telling us how cold it’s been and what chaos it’s causing today. As if that is not bad enough we are then shunted off to a variety of locations around the country which now all include a visit to the salt mines of cheshire, a field somewhere in the home counties and an assortment of stranded/kids having fun/schools closed/stiff upper lip reports. Aaaaaarggh!

Combined with the nightly concerns over whether the grit/salt will last out and (now) whether the gas will last it is starting to get a bit (news) desperate.

To make matters worse the news editors are clearly desperately searching for a new angle or development resulting from the “big freeze” as it has been dubbed. Last night ITV news decided to go with the “As cold as the North Pole” angle with a list of current temperatures in “traditional” cold spots thrown in as proof. The news reader was almost starting to sound proud of our great temperatures as much as to say finally we’re beating the foreigners at the weather! The quality of our weather is obviously something of national pride.

But where next? If we keep going down this route where do we go from here. Here are my top ten potential headlines for the week ahead.

1. Government to consider Igloos to solve housing crisis!
2. White-out Britain heralds new Ice Age. (The Ice age slogan has been much favoured in the past – overdue an outing this time – you heard it here first)
3. Cameron calls on Brown to explain dithering over weather
4. Brown says Cameron doesn’t even have policy on weather
5. Brown/Cameron/Clegg call for weather inquiry
6. Will the milk run out
7. We’ve run out of milk (pics of thirsty babies, pics of cows)
8. Russia holds Britain to ransom over gas supplies – new cold war!
9. Now for the Big Thaw
10. The Big Freeze cost me my job – Gordon Brown